More F1 Fans Urgently Needed
New McLaren head honcho Zak Brown has stated that F1 should have another GP in the states to boost its popularity. Other left field ideas may, or may not, include;
- A half-time (yes, that will become a thing) concert headlined by Taylor Swift at every single race.
- During lulls, social media voting where the driver with the least votes has their power unit spontaneously combust.
- Mandatory cabaret performances from the team bosses whose cars get knocked out in qualifying between sessions.
- A push to pass button tha..oh no, ignore that. Sorry.
Respect Your Elders
Elder statesman Max Verstappen has been handing out advice to young whipper snapper Lance Stroll, who makes his F1 debut at the tender age of 18. He’s told the youngster to respect his elders and not to attempt any outrageous overtaking moves, especially on him.
Pirelli are bringing a new upgrade with neon coloured sidewalls to their tyres to liven up the scenery a bit, probably to make up for the dreary car liveries (except you, Williams). They also promise to make the tyres last a lot longer, which will inevitably lead to knee-jerk reactions that F1 is broken and the tyres need to be made of silly putty again. The compounds are noticeably much wider too, giving Sebastian Vettel even more room to go the wrong side of kerbs only to insist he hasn’t.
Watches from McLaren
And finally, McLaren have unveiled a new 40g state-of-the-art watch. It’s rumoured to be made with all the spare iron filings from blown up Honda power units, so stock isn’t expected to run out anytime soon. Expect them to be very thirsty on your battery, a bit slow, dull in colour but generally work OK most of the time.