F1’s most notorious non-story took a fresh turn this week, as the FIA announced yet another load test to be applied to the front wings of Formula One cars, in an apparent attempt to allay suspicions that Red Bull Racing are circumventing the rules with flexible aerodynamics.

Under Formula One’s technical regulations, most moveable aerodynamic parts are prohibited, but rival F1 teams, Internet videos and overzealous users of Photoshop have long claimed that Red Bull’s front wings flex while out on track, even though they pass the load tests applied during the weekend in the garage.

Loads of varying size have been proposed for the new tests, with one suggestion that all of the letters of complaint from McLaren about Red Bull’s wings could be used as a suitable weight. “This would fulfil F1’s environmental obligations by recycling tonnes of paper that would otherwise just go straight in the bin … er, I mean, be properly considered according to standard FIA procedures,” a spokesman for the sport’s governing body said.

Other options are said to include getting Norbert Haug to sit on all of the front wings in the presence of FIA scrutineers, or doing away with scrutineering entirely and simply disqualifying cars on the basis of whether anonymous Internet users reckon a wing flexes or not.

“We welcome all attempts to ensure that all teams are playing by the rules,” said Graspy Strawhandler, Assistant Deputy Sub-Head of Paperclips and Sour Grapes at McLaren. “Circumventing the spirit of the regulations is a serious issue in F1, especially when it’s someone else who’s doing it.”