Coming to you LIVE from the 13th floor of a Bristol hotel, Podium or Pits is Badger’s weekly guide to what’s hot and what’s not in Formula One. Stay tuned for F1 training tips, possibly the worst song lyrics ever written, more than one moose, a tyre in Serbia and a rule clarification.

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New year resolution number 1: don’t go mental and do this – This week we’re starting off on the Top Gear website, courtesy of Badger’s Craig Normansell. He alerted POP to a slideshow (sadly no magic lanterns) demonstrating the sort of things you, me, and the world can do to be as fit as an F1 driver.

 

POP’s favourite tip is definitely “juggling”, but the rest of it is surprisingly hardcore. POP has absolutely no desire to get involved with “Swiss Ball bridges…an Isometric Neck Harness or training on a four-way neck machine.” POP’s post Christmas regime is focused on a) ale, b) Christmas cake and c) having a nice lie down.

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THIS CANNOT BE TRUE – If there was a “Super-Pits” icon in POP’s armoury, it would have been deployed here.

This is in reference to an article on The Sun’s website, in which it is claimed (note the italics) that Lewis Hamilton has been recording R’n’B songs in a “top west London studio”.

With lyrics like:

I like driving well fast

it’s such a blast

going crazy at the wheel

clear I’m the real deal

Massa you’re a loon

your debris I leave strewn 

Note: these may not actually be lyrics written by Lewis Hamilton, but penned by POP. Record contract anyone?

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Heikki = yes – We like Mr. Kovalainen here in the Sett. He seems like a reasonable chap and, even better, he’s embraced the social media tools used by the yoof of today.

This means he can post funny things like this.

Tick.

Down wit da kidz - Caterham's Heikki Kovalainen

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This is just a bit odd – There’s no reason that this is in Pits really, apart from that it fits with the alternating nature of the column and POP’s a bit obsessive compulsive.

It turns out a tyre used by Michael Schumacher in 2006 has ended up with a Serbian mayor, who’s bloody chuffed about it all.

Yeah, us neither.

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A sensible rule? – The FIA have moved to remove all controversy about drivers making more than one move to block a rival trying to overtake.

A rule has been inserted which says:

More than one change of direction to defend a position is not permitted. Any driver moving back towards the racing line, having earlier defended his position off‐line, should leave at least one car width between his own car and the edge of the track on the approach to the corner.

POP thinks this is sensible, although rather regrets it had to be written down to try to make the drivers comply.