No prizes for guessing the winner of the 2013 United States Grand Prix. Someone else will have to start winning soon before everyone thinks that the German / Austrian national anthem combo is simply obligatory when someone wins a race. It isn’t, but Bizet’s Carmen is always a welcome sound (for the record, Bizet was French).

I don’t need to tell you what sort of a start Mark Webber had. A classic start. Let’s hope he gets it right at Brazil next weekend.

Whoah dude! Safety car on lap 1

It doesn’t look good if you lose control of your car on lap 1 and plough it into the wall so badly you need a safety car. Luckily for F1 supply teacher driver Heikki Kovalainen, it wasn’t him but instead it was piano playing and occasional bar brawler Adrian Sutil! Out came the safety car for a few laps as Sutil’s car was cleared away (sadly those marshall brooms are not yet capable of clearing away embarrassment).

Do you know what the black and orange flag signifies? Georgie Thompson certainly wouldn’t. Anyway, you don’t see it very much, but it’s a flag to basically say your car is BROKEN please pit to sort it out, like, now. Maldonado had the privilege of being shown the black and orange flag as a result of a ropey looking front wing.

Lewis Hamilton did not sound like a happy bunny in the early section of the race. Manage this, manage that, look after this, look after that – phrases that are not naturally in Hamilton’s repertoire.

Valtteri Bottas had a fine race indeed, eventually finishing in 8th place. Overtake of the race undoubtedly goes to Bottas for his brave move on Gutierrez.

We saw Webber hunt down Grosjean in the final few laps but to no avail – and then Hulkenberg almost had Alonso in the last lap of the race. Alonso isn’t 2nd place in this year’s World Championship for nothing.

F1 Grand Prix of USA - Previews

Calling all JB fans – your favourite driver got one point. I know! ONE POINT! Result. Perez got 6 points #awkward.

“I Love You”

If your team made you a car that just won you your 8th consecutive race in a season then, yes, you too would declare your undying love for your team. Which is exactly what Vettel did as he took yet another win in 2013 (personally, I’ve stopped counting, but I’ve heard it’s rather a lot).

Vettel – “We have an incredible team spirit. Incredible, I’m so proud of you. I love you. YES! SHAKE AND BAKE!”

Gee whizz – the Results!

DriverCarTeamGridFastest LapRace Time
1Sebastian Vettel1Red Bull11:39.8561:39:17.14825
2Romain Grosjean8Lotus3No time+00:06.28418
3Mark Webber2Red Bull2No time+00:08.39615
4Lewis Hamilton10Mercedes5No time+00:27.35812
5Fernando Alonso3Ferrari6No time+00:29.59210
6Nico Hulkenberg11Sauber4No time+00:30.4008
7Sergio Perez6McLaren7No time+00:46.6926
8Valtteri Bottas17Williams9No time+00:54.5094
9Nico Rosberg9Mercedes12No time+00:59.1412
10Jenson Button5McLaren15No time+01:17.2781
11Daniel Ricciardo19Toro Rosso10No time+01:21.0040
12Jean-Eric Vergne18Toro Rosso14No time+01:24.5740
13Felipe Massa4Ferrari13No time+01:26.9140
14Esteban Gutierrez12Sauber20No time+01:31.7070
15Heikki Kovalainen7Lotus8No time+01:35.0630
16Paul Di Resta14Force India11No time+01:36.8530
17Pastor Maldonado16Williams17No timelapped0
18Jules Bianchi22Marussia19No timelapped0
19Giedo van der Garde21Caterham18No timelapped0
20Charles Pic20Caterham22No timelapped0
21Max Chilton23Marussia21No timelapped0
22Adrian Sutil15Force India16No timeretired, 0 laps0