Olpe, Monday: The excavation of numerous early circuit designs by renowned (no, seriously) racing track designer Hermann Tilke have been proclaimed as “a momentous discovery” by archaeologists and motorsport experts alike, with excited commentators jumping up and down and exclaiming that we are now able to gain a crucial insight into the mind of one of motorsport’s most regrettably influential figures, learning more about his methods and inspirations.
The notebook, entitled Rennenring-Drafts und Scheisse, is tentatively dated from around 2001, and includes designs for several new circuits – some of which are vaguely recognisable as now-existing Tilke-designed tracks – and some modifications to old classics such as Monza, Spa and Silverstone.
A German motorsport enthusiast, who discovered the file at Tilke’s old home in Nordrhein-Westphalien, commented that “What is most staggering is that all of the designs have been drawn in what appears to be wax crayon. The colour seems not to be significant, as most of the tracks are drawn in a variety of shades, but it appears that Hermann has been working almost exclusively in the medium of wax since he began designing circuits.”
Rumours that Herr Tilke wasn’t allowed to use proper crayons like his contemporaries because of the risk of poisoning have been flatly denied by sources close to the infamous architect, though some motorsport fans have already suggested that this information correlates with the long-held suspicion that Tilke suffers from a terminal lack of imagination and is, as one source put it, “a little bit dim.” Tilke’s close associates have also denied the significance of some of the pages of the notebook, which appear to be covered in what has been described as “indecipherable childish scribble.”
Some fans have expressed outrage at one of the drawings, which appears to show the fast straights and tight chicanes of Monza being replaced with a series of slow-to-medium switchback corners, though Tilke himself was unavailable for comment, having apparently “just popped off to W.H. Schmidt for a new box of crayons.”