In recent years Canada has been a staple McLaren winning ground. Not so in 2013: McLaren took home … the Badger abacus says … that’s right, nul points. Those glaringly orange T-shirts (which the McLaren team rapidly change into when they win a race) must be gathering dust in a Woking cupboard somewhere, forgotten.

Credit: Red Bull Racing Media
Credit: Red Bull Racing Media

But the 2013 Canadian grand prix was all about one man: victorious Vettel, vanishing-off-into-the-distance Vettel and very-annoyingly-dominant Vettel. Putting aside a minor brush up against the wall of champions, Vettel was in another race for the entire 70 laps.

After yet another 2013 clean getaway off the starting grid, Vettel already began to pull away from the rest of the field, and then we all forgot about him entirely for the next 69 laps to focus on some great mid field scraps.

On lap 6 Sutil pirouetted in the middle of the track, but luckily ended up facing the right way at the end of the spin. Raikkonen headed backwards for most of the race after being told to save fuel – eventually finishing down in 9th. Around a third of the way through the race we were treated to a cracking scrap between Massa and Sutil. Sadly we didn’t get to hear any of the famous Massa-Rob Smedley pep talk radio messaging – an entertainment in itself. In other Sutil news, the Force India driver was handed a drive through penalty by the stewards for ignoring blue flags.

The race winner from Monaco, Nico Rosberg, managed to lose 2 places in the space of a couple of corners on lap 31. He ended a vaguely respectable 5th. Can’t win ’em all. Unless you’re Vettel, that is. Sergio Perez pulled off a bold move over Valtteri Bottas at the mid point – the latter’s 3rd place in qualifying translated into an uninspiring 14th on race day.

Mark Webber collided with the Caterham of Van der Garde, losing Webber a good chunk of his front wing and gaining Van der Garde a 10-second stop/go penalty from the stewards. A few laps later and Alonso got the better of Webber down the start-finish straight. It wasn’t long before Van der Garde was driving with his front wing under the car. Unconventional, yes, performance-enhancing? No. Needless to say he did not make it back to the pits.

“Pretty exciting” – said Ross Brawn as he was interviewed live by the BBC F1 team during a gaspingly exciting scrap between former team hates mates, Hamilton and Alonso … just at the moment Alonso got the better of Brawn’s driver Hamilton. BBC F1 coverage – the new bad luck token?

Gutiérrez ended his race in the tyre wall with a mere 3 laps to go, which rounded off a frankly dire race for the Sauber team (Hulkenberg retired 18 laps earlier).

And finally…

  • Is it just me, or does the chequered flag radio conversation between Red Bull team principal Christian Horner and Vettel sound exactly the same every time?
  • Flag of the Race: Blue.
  • Tyre Trophy of the Race: Paul Di Resta, who managed a record-breaking 57 laps on his Pirellis.
  • Quote of the Day: “I’ve never been so keen to get out of the car” – an upbeat Jenson Button.

Results and all that jazz

1Sebastian Vettel1Red Bull11:16.5341:32:09.14325
2Fernando Alonso3Ferrari61:16.203+00:14.40818
3Lewis Hamilton10Mercedes21:16.354+00:15.94215
4Mark Webber2Red Bull51:16.182+00:25.73112
5Nico Rosberg9Mercedes41:16.534+01:09.72510
6Jean-Eric Vergne18Toro Rosso71:17.909lapped8
7Paul Di Resta14Force India171:17.841lapped6
8Felipe Massa4Ferrari161:16.939lapped4
9Kimi Raikkonen7Lotus101:17.766lapped2
10Adrian Sutil15Force India81:17.694lapped1
11Sergio Perez6McLaren121:17.369lapped0
12Jenson Button5McLaren141:17.458lapped0
13Romain Grosjean8Lotus221:17.607lapped0
14Valtteri Bottas17Williams31:18.004lapped0
15Daniel Ricciardo19Toro Rosso111:18.257lapped0
16Pastor Maldonado16Williams131:18.105lapped0
17Jules Bianchi22Marussia191:18.873lapped0
18Charles Pic20Caterham181:19.380lapped0
19Max Chilton23Marussia201:19.566lapped0
20Esteban Gutierrez12Sauber151:19.478retired, 63 laps0
21Nico Hulkenberg11Sauber91:19.056retired, 45 laps0
22Giedo van der Garde21Caterham211:21.811retired, 43 laps0